Eric Back to Balad

I woke up very early this morning and started my daily worry and wonder about Eric, whom we hadn't heard from for two weeks because he's been off base with no Internet. I hopped out of bed to check my e-mail, and to my relief and surprise, there were four e-mails from him with attached pictures of his most recent adventure. The name of his e-mail was "Back Home, Away from Home, Away from Home." I guess that means back home to Balad, which is away from his home in Guam, which is away from his home in Utah. He has a lot of "homes" right now. He says he is well and healthy.

This picture is one of the many Ugandans who are nonmilitary but work in security jobs. Eric figures they are making good money to work for the U.S. in Iraq.

Eric dug this trench for the electricians at the FOB he's been at for the last two weeks. The vehicle behind him is an armored backhoe with ballistic glass. He said it's hard to see through, but he managed. He says he's getting really skilled at operating the machinery.

Iraq army guys at a check point.


Eric doing cement work at Balad.

Much of the countryside is small farms. This is a fruitstand on the side of the road.

Two local guys who acted as interpreters during their convoy.

Eric took this picture during convoy. There was a space between the 18-wheeler Eric was driving and the vehicle in front of him, so this crossing guard took advantage of the space and let these elementary kids cross. Notice the crossing guard's AK. Also notice the women in the background.

This cute little boy ran out to wave as they went by. I guess the children come running to hear the horn honk or just to wave.

This little boy wanted candy. Eric threw him some beef jerky, the only thing he had.

The gym used to be a prison. Here's Eric working out "behind bars."

Eric in front of his 18-wheeler before leaving on the convoy. He drove the whole way. His passenger was the sergeant who operated the radio. Even though Eric is in the Air Force, he's wearing an army combat uniform. Who could have guessed?

About to cross the Tigress River.

Out on the road.

Pictures for Today's Post

A few pictures of our Lagoon excursion. My friend's children work at Lagoon, and we got super discounted tickets.

Quinn's most recent piano recital. He got his sixth superior rating at Federation and was given his award.

My Aunt Mirm (Miriam Parker Ellett) passed away this month. She was a "surrogate mother" to my dad and his three younger brothers. Their mother died when my dad was only six.

Three of the four "little boys." It's very sad for me to watch my dad's brothers and sisters die one by one. I have very fond memories of them all during my childhood, and it's hard to realize that one day my own brothers and sisters and I will be the "oldest generation."

Video clip of Quinn at his recital.

Four-Month Mark

Well, it's almost four months now since we got home with Alex. I wanted to memorialize our feelings, frustrations, and victories we are experiencing with our adopted son. First the victories:

We are hardly ever having eating issues anymore. Michael and I both commented just the other day that Alex's appetite has been successfully awakened. I can't remember the last time he complained about food, except for school lunches, but even noncomplaining Quinn agreed with Alex that the school lunches are just awful. Quinn said he eats his because he's just starving by lunchtime, and then he eats half of Alex's lunch. We have decided to pack lunches for school now, and it seems to have solved the issue, not to mention it will be nice to stop throwing money away on lunches that are only partly eaten. Alex is even having seconds sometimes at dinner and seems to have more energy. In the past, he has been lethargic at times and doesn't seem to have the energy to do things.

The sleep issues have improved a lot, although Alex still asks, "Why?" EVERY single time we say it's time for bed. It is a twenty- or thirty-minute ordeal to get him finally into bed with teeth brushed and pajamas on. We have solved the morning dilemma by getting Alex up before Quinn and into the shower. We call him our one-speed boy, and that speed is SLOW. (I mentioned I would list the positives first. I guess this is starting to sound like a negative already.)

Alex is quick to say, "I love you," and quick to forgive most of the time. He is playing a little with neighborhood kids, and I haven't heard "no friends at school" for a long time. Out of the blue the other day, he said, "Mom and Dad, thanks for adopting me." Michael and I just looked at each other and tried not to let our mouths hang open.

Alex is quick to help. He helped me catch up on our photo album last Sunday and wouldn't leave until it was done. He helps in the yard and will wash dishes anytime I ask. He is always there for a kiss and hug. He is the first to say, "Thanks, Mom and Dad," when we go out for dinner or ice cream.

Alex doesn't complain about going to church. Can you imagine sitting in church three hours and not really understanding much? But he does it every week. He even fasted a couple weeks ago. He complained a lot, but when I told him he could eat if he wanted, that fasting was between him and Heavenly Father, he decided to continue on. (Later his Sunday School teacher told me he showed her how he kept a piece of candy in his pocket because he was so hungry. I don't know if he actually ate it or if he just kept touching it to give him strength!)

Biggest concerns that we are working on:
Alex is very into having fun. If something immensely fun is not planned and in his radar, he says, "Today bad day. Teachers stupid. Homework stupid. Lunch bad. Today stupid." We had a discussion this morning about attitude, that if he thinks it will be a bad day, it probably will be. When I told the boys good-bye, I said, "Bye, Quinn. Have a good day. Bye, Alex. Have a bad day." That brought a little giggle from Alex and turned things around. But honestly, at times it's just a string of complaints that are never ending. Are my other adoptive friends experiencing this? Example. We went to Lagoon a couple Saturdays ago because we have friends that got us very discounted tickets. About midday after having several hours of fun, Alex said, "What to do, Mom?" (We were in between rides.) I said, "What?" He said, "What to do? Boring." I am proud of myself for not losing it at that point. I said, "Lagoon is not fun enough for you?" He said, "Not really fun for me." What the heck? Can someone out there please explain this to me? Is it part of an attachment disorder? Now, I realize he is a little afraid of heights and doesn't like the feeling of "someone eating my stomach," but we went on ride after ride of his choosing, and yet he still complained that it wasn't fun enough.

He does his homework just to get it done. There is no thought to actually remembering how to do the math problem for future homework. If he can get the answer somehow for today's assignment, all is well. He can always ask mom how to do it again tomorrow, and the next day, and the next day, and the next day. Live for today kind of thing. Maybe it's typical, but he gets so angry at me while doing his homework, I think he would like to punch me. Yesterday I told him to take a break and go downstairs and punch the punching bag, he could pretend it was his school teacher. That brought a little giggle and seemed to end his rage.

Yes, I have had moments of,"Why did we do this? What was I thinking?" And as my friend said, admitting that won't give me the mother of the year award. But I actually haven't had those thoughts for a while now, and I have confidence and hope that things will just continue to improve.

I take my hat off to other moms that are out there doing what I'm doing, only they have a lot more younger children to care for than I do at this stage. I wonder how they do it and how they care for multiple adopted children along with their biological children.

Part 2 of Today's Post

After three months' worth of convincing, Alex allowed Marisssa to cut his hair. Yipee! The mullet is gone!!! Doesn't he look American? Soccer ended, and everyone on the team got a trophy. Alex wants me to send this picture to Igor and Natasha so his friends at the orphanage can see his trophy. The picture was taken after church.
Zack's birthday was in March. Marissa threw him a surprise party in our basement. The laughter coming from downstairs was contagious.

The Engaging Month of March

I have been horrible about keeping up with my blogging and have resolved to do better.

A lot has happened this month. We received interesting and somewhat terrifying news (at least for a mother) from Eric the end of February. Apparently their base in Balad gets hit with mortar attacks on a regular basis. I guess this is a take-it-in-stride, no-big-deal occurrence! Eric says the base has automatic weapons that detect the incoming mortar and shoot them down so they can't do any real damage, but on a foggy day, the technology doesn't work so well. An announcement will come over the PA system, "Incoming, incoming." Then everyone gets down on their faces, and shortly thereafter they feel the ground shake. Lovely. He keeps telling me not to worry, that he's safe. Two young men from Utah stationed in Afghanistan were killed this month. I keep thinking about their mothers.

Dad is doing much better. He kicked the pneumonia. Yahoo. Now he can tackle the remaining issues, his heart and then the chemotherapy. He gets a new pacemaker/defebrilator next week (tentatively). Mom says he has been out walking and feeling quite remarkable considering he underwent major cancer surgery a few weeks back.

Note the title of this post, "The Engaging Month of March." It's not totally accurate as Gage and Emily got engaged February 26! They are busy planning, working, and going to school. Their wedding date is June 5 in the Salt Lake Temple. The groom's mother has it easy. We've already got the tuxes and luncheon arranged. But guess what? I'm also the mother of the bride, as Marissa and Zack got engaged yesterday, March 29. They are planning on the first weekend in September. My children are dropping like flies! We are pleased with both engagements and love our soon-to-be daughter/son-in-law.

We went to parent-teacher conferences for Quinn and Alex last week, my awesome little sixth graders. I'm thanking heaven for Alex's progress. His teachers praised him, saying he's performing like he's been here eight months rather than three. I have to give Michael a lot of that credit. They read 30 minutes every morning and then again at night. We are in the midst of missionary discussions. We started out with a sister missionary at Temple Square, but we quickly decided we wanted our other children to be involved, so now we're doing them at our home with the elders. Max, Zack's friend, is translating for Alex. Although Alex understands a lot of English, we don't want any misunderstanding. Last Sunday Max couldn't come, so we cancelled with the missionaries, and instead Zack and Marissa taught an Easter lesson. Alex is so receptive. You could see a light go on in his eyes about so many things. The spirit was so strong. Last night Alex said family prayer in English. He got his little 4-steps-of-prayer card out that the missionaries gave him and said almost a perfect prayer in English, remembering to thank and then ask. One thing he said that brought tears to my eyes: "Bless Eric come home."

Zack kept the boys busy on Saturday and Sunday making a movie with our Camcorder. They titled it "Fifty Pounds." (We had watched Seven Pounds the night before.) In the movie, Quinn accidentally kills Zack. He goes on an eating binge and gains fifty pounds. Alex plays the part of Quinn's dad. We all watched the "movie" on Sunday, and I haven't laughed that hard in a long time.

Today is Marissa's birthday. She's 22 years old.

Visit to Logan

We drove up to Logan after church on Sunday to visit my parents. Dad looked pretty good for having cancer surgery and then pneumonia for a long time. It was a really good day.
We took different pictures with a timed flash so everyone could be in the picture.

Video clips of the kids having fun at Grandma and Grandpa's.

I am behind on my blogging. (If anyone can explain to me why my computer is underlining all my typing, I'd appreciate it. I can't get it turned off.)

I wanted to journal what has happened to my cute Dad the last month or so. My dad is 83 years old and has had heart trouble since he was 50 or so. He's undergone two triple bypass surgeries during his lifetime and currently has a pacemaker. He has been feeling so tired lately, and Mom insisited on taking him to the ER about the beginning of February. They ran all kinds of tests on him and discovered he has a VERY leaky valve and that his blood count was dangerously low, which resulted in a colonoscopy to find out why. The colonoscopy unveiled that he has colon cancer. They operated on him about ten days ago and took out about a foot and a half of his lower intestine. It was a scary day. Operations on an 83-year-old with a bad heart are uncertain. All five of his children were at the hospital that day, along with Mom. He did amazingly well, but now is facing chemotherapy for the next six months. He seems discouraged, and on top of that, he has been suffering with pneumonia for the last week and can't seem to shake it with his antibiotics. We hope he will be able to go home from the hospital very soon. I think Mom is give out. I wish I lived closer so I could be there for them.

Here are a couple videos we took last Sunday of my stir-crazy children anxious for spring.